30 Bananas a Day!

The Problem With Pineapples, The Bitch About Bananas...

I'm having a difficult time consuming pineapples and bananas (together
or separately) and was hoping someone could maybe clue me in on what I
might be doing wrong - or maybe someone is having a similar "negative
digestive experience" with these two sweet fruits. I know they are a
stable of the raw vegan diet, and I don't wanna miss out on enjoying
them regularly.

Pineapples

For years, I had been eating pineapples incorrectly: extremely
under-ripe. I just assumed that they were supposed to have a tangy
sting and "bite" to them, and just accepted that when eating them. But
it wasn't until I started trying to eat larger quantities of pineapple
(like an entire one in one sitting) that I started experiencing problems
with them. At first, I learned what the proper ripeness of a pineapple
should be, and made that adjustment. I let the pineapples get so ripe
to the point that they were just sweet, with no stinging bite to them.
This would require me to let them ripen to the point of almost starting
to rot in some areas - which I would cut away and throw out of course.

My problem: when I eat pineapple, I get SUPER bloated. That is, my
stomach organ itself bloats out like a basketball. I'm eating slowly,
chewing adequately - but still this happens. Additionally, I'm getting
pretty significant heartburn traveling up my esophagus. I'm eating the
pineapple by itself, so it's not a food combining issue. Maybe it's the
source of the pineapples? Chemicals pesticides? (I can only find
conventional, non-organic pineapple where I live.) Under-ripe when
picked? (I don't live in the tropics, so I assume the pineapples I eat
are picked WAY in advance of being ripe, and travel vast distances in
order to reach me.) Or is this a digestive enzyme or food allergy
problem maybe? A candida issue? Anyone have any ideas?

To make matters more complicated, after eating an entire pineapple - I
still feel really hungry, but yet if I try to eat more, the bloating
increases to a highly uncomfortable level. It's like a physical
contradiction: I'm still hungry, but I simply cannot eat anymore. In
fact, I cannot eat anything at all until the bloating subsides,
regardless of how hungry I still am.

What am I doing wrong? Or what might be wrong with me?


Bananas

First let me say that I do love bananas. They are delicious, of
course. But I have this really particular requirement about eating
bananas: they cannot be ripe. I'm not saying I can or want to eat
green bananas (yuck) - but an even BIGGER "gross-me-out" factor for me
is a ripe banana, especially with brown spots. There's something about
when a banana reaches that point of ripeness - it has an almost
fermented, alcoholic scent and taste to it (like a rotting bottle of
banana liqueur) that makes me quite seriously wanna PUKE! It's so bad,
that if I even see a banana starting to produce it's typical pattern of
tiny brown spot - I cringe! I cannot eat it at all, much less smell it
or even stand to look at it! Ridiculous I know. I don't remember ever
having any traumatic banana experiences as a child - it's just one of
those idiosyncratic things a person has I guess.

I try not to let the bananas go to waste, and I offer them to others
before throwing them out. But it's frustrating because I end up buying
and throwing out a lot of bananas. I try to time my purchase and my
consumption of the bananas to precisely coordinate their "peak
condition" according to my picky palate. But it's a lot like trying to
spot a UFO - you gotta be in the right exact place at the right exact
time, and you only get a few seconds before you miss it!

Anyone out there have this strange condition like me? This "Banana Brown-Spotaphobia"??

JackCalvin

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Comment by Jack Calvin on May 15, 2010 at 6:03pm
Dear People of 30BaD,

I just want to say thanks to all of the good people who responded to my pineapple-banana-rant with words of infinite wisdom and great humor. I read every entry and contemplated each perspective - and I think what I've decided to do is this.....

a) with regards to pineapple, since it's usually so vastly under-ripe when picked for my residential region, and consequently never fully reaches it's prime ripe potential - I'm going to dial-down the frequency with which I enjoy them, but when I do - they'll always be dripping sweet ripe with little and NO STANG!!

- AND -

b) with regards to Brown-Spotted Zombie Bananas! ....FINALLY, I DO NOT FEEL LIKE A FREAK! there are others of you out there that are also afflicted with Brown-Spotaphobia! - so I no longer feel so alone...you are my people!!! ::sigh:: :))) I will continue to eat them at that very specific moment, when the stars are aligned just right, immediately before the first banana even starts to have a daydream about popping up a tiny brown spot and becoming a Banana-Leopard.

Thank you all, once again - for making me feel whole again. :)

Much Love,

JackCalvin
Comment by Shawn Leonard on May 11, 2010 at 3:06pm
Jack,
Just taking a guess here, but I can read your post to indicate that you're referring to the brown spots on the banana and not just on the peel. So, just to be clear, the brown spots are only on the peel. If the banana itself has brown spots (not from bruises), then yeah, it's overripe. Sorry if I misread it.
Comment by Joy on May 11, 2010 at 11:33am
bananas-try focusing on the stem of the banana for ripeness. i've had bananas that got spots when they still seemed a bit starchy. i find once the stem starts to get that brown horizontal line in it they are ripe. maybe shifting your focus could help?
Comment by Evan on May 11, 2010 at 11:13am
What brand of bananas do you buy? Let me guess Dole? If you buy the organic Dole ones be sure to take them out of the bags, they will rot if you don't with all of the moisture. I had fair trade organic bananas the other day and these I actually enjoyed, I don't think I can go back to Dole. Try another brand. I never eat pineapple, it's never ripe. Mangoes are cheap now, they never disappoint, just let them sit in the sun for a few days.
Comment by Caroline Funny on May 11, 2010 at 9:34am
I, too, started having the bananas get a bit too ripe and experienced that fermented taste, and that actually tends to make me to not want any bananas. Which is sad, because I really do like them, =). But I am just learning to eT them before they reach that state. They still have brown spots but not so much so that they get all fermenty-like. Make any sense? Lol.

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