I have my fruit nice and ripe in my kitchen. I have been eating one or two fruit meals a day to prepare. I have everything ready to bring my fruit meals to work with me.....now all of a sudden the doubt creeps in. The voice that tells me that this is extreme, that I should just be a vegan and call it good. That I will fail, feel miserable, piss off my family and friends and not lose weight. I keep thinking that somehow I will be the exception and I wont receive the benefits from 811. Why does this happen? Why do these doubts only surface after nearly a month of preparing and research? Why, without even spending a day on 811, am I thinking about throwing in the towel? This is ridiculous.
I am starting anyway. I am so tired of f@cking around and not MAKING A DAMN DECISION and sticking with it. I am doubting myself because I am tired of failing, tired of being a miserable, lonely, tired, sick, obese girl but I have no faith I will change it. So, i am just going to have to do it without the faith that I will make it. I will just have to do it despite myself.
Wish me luck, kiwi for breakfast.