30 Bananas a Day!

All these "omg calories" "omg weight gain" "omg hypothetical situations" discussions are HORRIBLE. just horrible.

I went HCRV because I truly believed that it would heal my body from the damage I did to it, and the damage that the early years of eating SAD and not being all too active did.  I believe that HCRV is not only the healthiest way for people to live, but that it is the kindest to the planet.  I understand the fear of gaining weight, but this is supposed to be a forum that promotes HEALTH of body, mind, and spirit- not pleasing aesthetics.  I take it personally when people say this is a "diet that isn't working" because they're misunderstanding completely what it is.  It's a lifestyle based on compassion and awareness, from which you will happen to reap countless benefits- It is not just a band-aid for your belly.

One of the things that attracted me to 30BAD was the LACK of people complaining about every little dip and curve, every 2lb/1kg difference in their weight, etc.  I find it alienating when every discussion is someone freaking out over a MINOR weight gain, or asking a hypothetical question for the sake of proving a moot point.  It's juvenile.  I know I haven't been a member long, but in the short time I have been here it seems like the site has been overrun by fad-dieters and people who understand NOTHING about nutrition, and aren't willing to listen to those with years of solid experience.  Jeepers.  I would really like to see more worthwhile discussions from the centered&balanced members of 30BAD.  I will start one myself later.  Cheers, truly fruity people!

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Comment by AJ on April 18, 2012 at 5:48am

Adam- I do appreciate your perspective and how you always try to take a logical and (what seems to me) unbiased approach.  First I would like to say that I'm well aware of the biological aspect of beauty, that things such as shiny hair, facial symmetry, shoulders being narrower than hips on women, etc suggest that they are healthy and capable of bearing children, and thus are found attractive.  There's nothing wrong with taking pride in one's appearance, but it should not be the be-all-and-end-all, and for way too many people, it is.  I would like to say, though, that I am absolutely compassionate towards people with weight concerns and want nothing more than to help them.  I will give an example, look over my comments in this discussion. 

I really, truly understand what all the anxiety is about.  However, people wanting advice and help, and wanting to hear their own thoughts and conclusions reiterated back to them are two very different things.  From what I have seen, the people who start these discussions are very hard-headed about their beliefs (ie- one can restrict calories in this lifestyle and still thrive).  Yes, some members are more judgmental than helpful, but for the most part people really try to offer sound, solid advice and it is met with disdain. 

Like many of these girls, I have a history of eating disorders which I talked about in the discussion I posted above.  Think I wasn't MORTIFIED when I gained some weight during my first few weeks eating HCRV?  I absolutely was.  Not only did I gain weight initially, but my skin broke out like crazy, which I have always been deeply self-conscious about.  However, I read through all the threads and saw all the comments where long-timers INCLUDING FREELEE said that this was normal, that once my body stabilized it would come off and that I should keep going.  In addition to reading/listening to their words, I did my own research to back it up and decided that it was worth continuing this lifestyle.  And, as promised, the weight came back off and my skin is clearing up wonderfully, and I've never been happier.

All the advice these individuals are looking for is ALREADY HERE, readily available, and there is a community that is more than eager to welcome them and offer support.  However, it gets really tiresome when the same people consistently have the same concerns and reject the same good advice in the same negative fashion every time.  If someone truly believes that this lifestyle is that deeply flawed, that they're being lied to, and that it won't work for them then they should abstain, rather than flooding the network with negativity.  All their concerns are being and have before been addressed, but some are not willing to listen and THAT is frustrating.  When every discussion I see on the homepage is about the same thing essentially, it's hard to not at least notice.  For the record, I have stopped reading and posting in them.  Thanks.

Lala- I do not blame them for having their concerns, but I blame them for not doing enough prior research.  Never in Freelee's story does she state that the diet worked immediately and she never struggled and never gained and never had doubts.  She addresses this issue, and says that when she was regularly eating enough carbs from fruit and getting all her greens, everything fell into place.  And as I said, it has become increasingly more difficult to avoid these posts because the homepage is littered with them.

My basic advice is that if you want it, you'll do it, and if you don't do it then you don't want it badly enough.  Plain and simple.

Comment by Macuilxochitl on April 18, 2012 at 4:54am

The issue is really what I perceive as a lack of collaboration. There's been hundred of answers, hundred of pieces of advice, encouragement and even comfort regarding this topic. Anybody with weight loss concern can just delve into them and find a vast array of things useful. But they choose not to. Instead, they keep bringing those impulsive freaking out topics all the time. To me, that's plainly a lack of respect and maturity. I'd rather rant around a bit unproductively than endorse this through passivity =)

Comment by Lala M. Apples on April 18, 2012 at 4:46am

Well written Adam!

Comment by Adam on April 18, 2012 at 4:41am

Hey

People come here for a number of reasons. Some people are motivated by environmental reasons, some animal rights, some health, some aesthetics, some a combination. None of these reasons are more right or wrong than another, nor are they better or worse reasons. They are just different reasons based on someones current perceptions.People invariably do tend to find that they are more likely to stick out the diet when there is more than one motivating factor.

One thing that Lala highlighted, which is important to remember, is that one of the ways that the website is promoted, not just by the owners, but by other forum members, and by the book which is recommended by this website, is weight management and aesthetic, sculpted bodies. So it would be unrealistic to expect that some people wouldn't be attracted to the forum because they want to manage their weight and improve their body image in a sustainable way. It isn't wrong to want to be attractive. It is an innate biological instinct, that recognises that beauty is a symptom of health. Unconsciously, people associate the two as being synonymous. Of course, we know that isn't always the case. It is possible to be beautiful without being healthy. But this website is advertised on the basis that one can consciously influence your own aesthetic appearance to achieve health that is visible.

There will be a variety of discussions that will inevitably arise as a result of this. If someone has concerns about weight management, they needed to be supported to understand their situation. You talked about how this is about health - well let us be clear, weight management is an aspect of health. Yes, if someone is worried about a few pounds gain, this may be slightly over-reactive. But when someone experiences such anxiety, they need support and education to manage that anxiety and offer reassurance, not judgement.

I don't think there is anything wrong with you not liking discussions about certain topics either. There are lots of discussions that I don't bother to read. But that is the key - If I am not feeling in the mood to tolerate certain people or subjects or do not feel that I can offer something constructive based on compassion (since this is one of the things that you say motivates you as an individual for being here) then I don't bother to read it at a particular time. Sometimes I feel more able to read it at another time. Sometimes I forget about it altogether. Sometimes I just never respond.

You are the one who chooses what you exposes yourself to here. It is a microcosm of the greater internet where there is a similar wealth of potential things you could expose yourself to. You might not want to expose yourself to all aspects of that either, so what do you do - you select what you expose yourself to and ignore the rest.

So I would say that if you don't like reading posts about people managing their weight, don't read those posts. That way, you don't feel pissed off or offended, and those who feel they need support can receive it from those who do feel ok about offerring that support. That is a win win situation.

Take care

Adam x

Comment by Macuilxochitl on April 18, 2012 at 4:24am

Well, actually, Lala, you're right. It's kinda sad.

Comment by Lala M. Apples on April 18, 2012 at 4:09am

Well can you blame them? The site is often "advertised" using Freelee scantily clad and specifically discussing her body and experience. I don't have a problem with it, personally. If you got it FLAUNT IT! However, there are several messages sent ... yes be healthy, but hey you can have the ideal body too. That is why I think many women are caught up on looks when they sign up! :-D Just ignore the posts and select the ones that vibe with you

Comment by Macuilxochitl on April 18, 2012 at 3:17am

I'mma subscribe to the obnoxious trend of commenting without contributing :P and say: +1

Comment by AJ on April 18, 2012 at 2:00am

Thanks guys!!  I agree 100% with both your comments, very heartening for me =] 

And Peter- I should have added in this blog that everyone needs to just THROW OUT THE SCALE.  Unless they are medically obese and came here to lose weight and NEED to be monitored in that fashion, there is no reason to even own one.

Thanks so much again =]

Comment by Dreamer on April 18, 2012 at 1:48am

THIS! thank you for expressing yourself so eloquently. it makes me feel like ripping my hair out when everybody is obsessing over weight and is talking about overeating and fat gain from fruit like... come on. I know many of us unfortunately became attracted to this idea because we wanted to become slimmer but it's not life. what the hell is there to enjoy in life when all you care about is weight and your health and wellbeing means nothing? people need to start loving their bodies and taking care of themselves. your body will thank you later and you might even see what you wanted to be in the mirror some day. 

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