30 Bananas a Day!

hello everyone
just wanted to share that i had my first proper ME/CFS crash today, since going full on 811rv. this is me trying to understand what precipitated it really, as i'm REALLY trying to avoid crashing, for obvious reasons, but also because i'm trying to learn to balance out my energy as i think its much more positive for me. crashing often takes days if not weeks to recover from, but i'm hoping with my new found 811, that this will lessen (this is one effect that raw food definitely has for me).

so... today was a day for me and the people i live with in community to spend sharing about how we are living, our hope and dreams and fears, and plans for the future. a big day for me! in the winter, when i was bad, well even trying to hold any conversation was challenging! but i've been doing so good, guess i overestimated my powers somewhat. i should have read this as a potential 'crash' point, but didn't. several people talking for several hours about really important stuff, what was i thinking!!!!

anyway... i actually managed about 3 hours (with breaks). which in itself is awesome. and some of it was difficult, and i was proud of how i could be really conscious, really express myself and listen to other people, and use some of my skills as a mediator to diffuse potentially conflictual conversations. but ... i reached a point where my brain just started shutting down. this is an interesting one for me... because in theory i've got good at noticing pre crash signs and taking myself off to bed sharpish. but i didn't this time. kept talking, and apparently, while i was making sense me, i really wasn't making any sense to other people. my energy dropped sharpish, i couldn't string sentences together, and before i knew it i was lying on the ground in a heap, hands over my eyes and ears (shutting out noise and light, which had REALLY intensified to painful levels), barely able to move, or communicate at all. its a strange feeling, like been at the bottom of a very deep well. there is some sensation, but very little.

my lovely bf has experienced this before, and pretty much picked me up and took me to bed. cuddled me until i started to come out of it a bit. he's so wonderful :-))) i've been in bed ever since, but obviously somewhat functional as i wouldn't be writing this lol!

so... a little wake up call to take things a bit easier i think. i'm also premenstrual which doesn't help. one of the interesting thoughts i did have at the bottom of that well was 'however crashed i get, i want to stay 811rv'. wow. ususally that's when i cave into cooked, when i'm crashed.

anyway... i'll let you all know over the next few days how my recovery goes.
hugs, especially to cecilie and anyone else really struggling with CFS/ME

emxxx

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Replies to This Discussion

Hi on my way to bed, just wanted to send you a big hug too. Be gentle with yourself, I know its awfull to be in that place.
Let us know how youre doing tomorrow.
I made the same mistake two days ago. I got sssssoooo frustrating with doing nothing and went out. I know thats a recipe for disaster because I know I will not respect my limitations when I feel like that...but what to do...!
I havent crashed this bad for a very long time. Couldnt have anyone talk to me, and could even lift my arms . Aouch!
Im still pretty shocked. Im a bit confused that I chrash so much worse now that Im on 811. But maybe my body has let down the guards and now its more vulnerable? Any thoughts??
Maybe its more vulnerable now that its also cleaning the house??

Knowing that you have healed from CFS once is really an inspiration for me. It keeps my hopes up.
HUGS
hello, and sending you BIG BIG HUGS and love so that you get over your crash soon.

its hard trying to explain to anyone who hasn't experienced this what it feels like, and how long it can take to recover from it. I'm at a week now from mine, and have a little bit more energy, but still no where near like i was before the crash. its just soooo FRUSTRATING seeing most everyone managing to go about things, when we can't, and having to micromanage our energy to ridiculous levels just to be able to function at a level WAY LESS than other people.

breathe!

i feel that CFS people are extra sensitive anyway, and when crashed are ridiculously sensitive. light, noise, any sensory imput really is just OVERWHELMING.

so... 811rv i'm sure increases sensitivity, my sense of smell has become amazing, and i'm only 2 weeks 100% no overts (yay me!). but it will be healing all sorts of things internally that we cannot even imagine. for me it also makes any 'cheating' with my food unbearable, i really really really need and have to stay at 100%. this was the same last time i did raw as well. and yes, i did manage to heal alot of my symptoms last time too, but obviously not permanently. but i was 2 years 100% high fat then. this time, i'm hoping the healing will be deeper and longer lasting.

there will be set backs for all of us on this path. its about how we pick ourselves up and carry on that is the important thing. don't let this throw your diet. rest as long as you need too. no pushing! try and keep the calories up (the 2000 a day thing for me feels balancing at the mo, and do we CFS people need balancing).

i got an email from durianrider and he said he'd healed from CFS. woot!!!!! i'd love to hear the full story, but just knowing that is something!!!

so... keep us all updated, writing my blog each day feels like a positive thing to keep on track for me, maybe you could find something similar for you. otherwise the days can just blur into each other, in a mush of tiredness and frustration. keep finding the little positives. keep trying to move, even if its only bed yoga.

i'm trying to improve my positive thinking, mainlining some audio books about this, just trying to reprogramme my brain really! trying anything to stop the CFS/depression downward spiral that can happen so easily. i'm determined that this crash won't be the start of a downward spiral, but a little blip on my general upward spiral.

we can heal ourselves of this, i know we can!!!

love and hugs
emmaxxxx
Thank you so much emma!

Yeah, the positive thinking is important. Difficult at times though. Sometimes I just cant cope with the thought of another day going by ..in bed!!! AArrrghh it makes me SOOOOO angry !!!
I want the beat up my pillows and scream!!! Only I cant!!!!!!

But no, this will not affect my diet. Nooo way :)

Would like to hear DR s story too. No wonder hes a tough guy:) ! I dont think anyone heals from CFS with out gaining ALOT of strength!

Ahhh I thought you did 811 last time?? Yes, then you will heal deaper this time, for sure.

Its a good idea to blog,will see if I can do that.

C

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