My girlfriend and I have had a very complex and quite challenging romantic journey together, breakups, other people involved etc.
We've been together for two years and much of that has been a long distance relationship (not recommended!).
Finally I have realised how much I truly love her and want to be with her, and have taken the plunge and agreed to move to the other side of the country to start a new life living together.
I would be the first to admit that I haven't always been the best boyfriend, to her or the other women that have been in my life.
I really want this to be different. I want to demonstrate my love to her every day in every way. I want to find the right balance and devote my life to making her happy.
Any advice on how to do this? Tell me about your dream guy, or great things current/former partner did in a relationship. My key words are loving, supportive, not suffocating, adventurous, spontaneous, romantic, funny and patient.
Please share your thoughts.
Thanks, will be eagerly reading any advice!
Not sure how old you guys are?? But I'd say...Ask her to marry you... and never be with any other gal eva again :) haha Was that too extreme or what?? lol But I know that's what I'd want... If you truly love her, how could you live without her...and why not spend the rest of your life with her??? But I would also say honesty.... and ummm, faithfulness, putting your partner before yourself.. that kinda thing. I'm sure you'll be fine, you seem to really care for her and thats what counts! Hope she loves you just as much ;)
Thanks Apple :) Actually she proposed to me last month, that's why I'm moving!! You must be a mind reader :)
OMG... girls really do that?!?? You are a lucky guy!!! ;) Well that is wonderful!! I am soooo happy for you both then!!! Oh and by the way, perfect key words....and i don't think you can be suffocating to the person if you really love each other. I mean knowing you are really loved...special...wanted... that's what we all want right? I think you'll do just fine :)
I would say I feel most loved when my boyfriend shows me he loves me. Vocal confirmation is great, but it's your actions that will really solidify how she knows that you love her. Pay attention to what she responds to well like if she smiles when you grab for her hand in public make a habit of that. Offer to help her in any way that you can. I love when my boyfriend offers to help me with homework or moving me or anything. Moving to her is one of the biggest ways you are showing her you love her right now and I think that's great. But always go the extra mile when you can. She'll remember it.
Learn how to listen and connect with her feelings and needs. I recommend this to all people in all relationships. :) Check out the book Don't Be Nice, Be Real, by Kelly Bryson. He's also got some really cool YouTube videos.
I think you've taken a great first step just by posting this, making a public statement to us and to yourself that you are going to change.
Be yourself - get all that negative stuff (like infidelity) out of the way so you can shine. : )
I agree with the other ladies 100% but on a side note, you will need to allow for an adjustment period when you start living together. It's a whole different ball game, lol.
Just make sure you're open to compromise, and keep those lines of communication WIDE OPEN! :)
Listen to each other, grow together, and love.
Most importantly, be yourself. Don't put too much pressure on yourself to be the "perfect boyfriend", it will wear you out. Just be real.
Good luck! :)
Thank you everyone who has taken the time to reply to this thread. I really value your advice and I'm sitting here soaking it all up like a sponge! :)
Look up Mark Gungor's wisdom on Youtube.
Here's a good start:
(my embed no workum)
I like this vid Freelee once posted: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjevBQ-clfw&feature=player_embedded :)
Tony Robbins has some pretty good stuff on relationships. Together with his wife. Check on youtube.
I think to have a successful relationship not just one partner has to work things out, or even both partners individually, but both partners together. You don't want to grow into your version of 'the perfect man' and find out that this is not what she is into at all.
Next to being super nice and great i also suggest to find a way to stay interesting and sexy for her. A little mysterious. I heard from so many women that got bored by their relationship because they felt more like siblings rather than lover!
Good on you to think about how to make her happy! <3
Every day consciously look for something new about your girlfriend...and enjoy her :)