30BaD has minimums, (add more for activity), for good reason, see here: Females: 2500 Males: 3000
Are most of your calories coming from fruit? Don't rely on your after 4 meals to supply your calories. I'm new to this but 5000 sounds like a lot of calories! I basically have to force myself to eat 2000. Make sure you're eating your highest calorie meal for breakfast so that you aren't craving throughout the day.
I can't comment on weight gain from a personal perspective, but I would like to offer some reassurance on the principal of gaining weight when coming from a restrictive past.
Firstly, no, 5,000 calories isn't a lot of calories if it's what your body wants and needs. That is the amount you need to consume in order to heal, which is why you feel deprived eating 3,000 calories a day. Your body is driving you to smash in the calories for a reason, so it's great that you're listening and doing so. I think there is some confusion with this lifestyle, with people (generally young girls with ED backgrounds) thinking that eating as many carbs as you like somehow means eating thousands of calories to the point of feeling sick. In that instance, yes, 5,000 calories would definitely be too much! But not in your case - your body's trying to heal from 6 years of restriction.
What will happen at some point is that your appetite will slowly start to reduce, and you will find your body spontaneously starts to lose weight. People always ask how long this part of the process will take, but it truly could be anywhere from 2 months to 2 years, it all depends on the individual. It's so important that you don't at any point try to force the weight off - this delays healing and stresses your body. Let it do its thing. It's also incredibly important that you don't do any intense exercise. I often see people recommending this, but it's a counter-productive move when your metabolism is healing. Regular, moderate exercise is great during this time, but don't push yourself as this will delay healing and stress your body (and won't result in the weight loss you desire - it usually causes the body to hold onto/gain weight as a protective response).
I can appreciate how hard it must be to go through this process and stick it out, not knowing how much weight you'll gain, or when you'll start to lose it - which is why so many people quit once they've started gaining. But - if you can stick it out, then you end up like Freelee, able to eat as much as you like yet remain super slim.
Stay strong my love. Keep flooding your body with the nutrients and calories it's so desperate for, rest as required (very important for healing) and at some point you will be in better shape mentally, emotionally, physically and metabolically than you've ever been before!
If you come from an eating disorder background you MUST go through a period of refeeding, and that will be A MINIMUM of 3000+ kcal / day. If you need 5000 kcal now, go for it. Once your metabolism is healed your appetite will go back to normal and you'll not crave so many calories.
First i'd like to say thank you sweet dates for posting :) And also thank you to everyone who's commented so far.
I come from a past of ED, over training and my body shut down in the fall.
I've been allowing myself to heal and that has included increasing my calories (around 3500 to 4500 per day) lots of sleep, minimum 10 hours and hardly any training.
I do yoga daily and walk but not much more then that.
I don't weigh myself so not sure how much i've gained but its a good bit. When i forget how bad I felt before and when I got sick I get super upset about the gain. But when i stop focusing on my reflection and go internally i am so grateful at how much progress my body has made.
My immune system is stronger, I sleep better, my brain feels calmer, etc.
I'm trusting that it will even itself out, it's only been about 3 or 4 months now.
People obviously think its crazy to eat so much, especially so many bananas!!! But I trust this lifestyle, it makes sense deep down and I know we can all heal from our destructive paths.
We just need to stay positive!!
lots of love