The parents don’t understand. “Don’t believe everything you hear” mom says as she scarfs down her lean cuisine. Every time we have a conversation about my diet it turns into an argument. They cannot provide any science telling me the way I am eating is wrong, yet they persist in ignorance. “You realize you’ll never be able to go out to eat with us ever again.” It hurts. I am only seventeen and I’ve always been a healthy eater and naturally thin.. I told my parents about this lifestyle several weeks ago, but now that school is out, I am finally able to follow through with it and have been a vegan for the past several days. My family is healthier than the majority of Americans but still basically following the SAD diet. They don’t understand.
How did you deal with the social aspects of this diet?
Is it worth it?
It is hard, but if it wasn't hard it wouldn't be worth it.
I can't know for sure without knowing your family or having seen their body language or heard their tone of voice but often times when someone says something like that you hear 'You realize you’ll never be able to go out to eat with us ever again' but often what they are actually saying to themselves is 'If I ever did a diet like that I'd never be able to eat out'. Bashing someone else's diet or other lifestyle choice is often a defence mechanism so they don't have to question their own diet. If there is something about their diet or life that makes them unhappy then they have things they eat or drink to comfort themselves and because of that all they can see are the negative effects of your diet which would cut them out.
At the same time, as a lot of us probably have done, if you have a gained a reputation for trying really out there things, believing it strongly and then moving on soon after then you can't blame them for not trusting your instinct - but perseverance will prove that wrong.
If they complain about having to buy or prepare your specialty meals then just do it yourself - if you remove it from their life and don't make a big deal about it then often they will let you do as you please.
Leading by example I think is the best way - show that you're enjoying it, show that its easy and only talk about it to them if they ask, and if they ask don't go on a rant just answer the question - like religion, no one wants it shoved in their face.
So for me personally - before going HighCarb i had a reputation for making healthy choices but also some pretty out their ones so no questioned it. I was buying and cooking almost all of my own food and i was away at college or out volunteering most of the time so it wasn't in their face. Now, after i've settled into it and they can see I'm happy and healthy, questions are slowly being asked and advice is being taken.
It does make it awkward for eating out - i haven't eaten out with someone in probably over a year :( - but i wouldn't go back for love nor money: I'm in control of my acid reflux, i reversed my diastatis and hypothyroidosis, i have tonnes of energy and strength, i've got control over my nerves and i can think crystal clearly.
I am lacking on the social side but hopefully I'm going to use this lifestyle to find new friends - finding them through this lifestyle means you will instantly connect and relate no matter what so there is a silverlining: it can filter down the people you see to those that you'll have a deep connection with.
Sorry for the ENORMOUSNESS of the this reply
You hit the nail on the head with the "trying really out there things, believing it strongly and then moving on soon after". I do have that reputation.. I also have pretty bad nerves as well. Thank you very much for the advice!
Yeah, it will pass once you stick with this for long enough and keep it to yourself for a while.
What also helped with nerves for me was putting myself into the public more - I'm a musician so I tried playing as often as possible, I talked more in class and I started volunteering in a shop and ended being the front of house so I had to talk to every single person that came in - good and bad. One main thing to remember for nerves around people - if you think they're too cool for you and haven't talked to you yet: they're actually as shy if not more shy than you; If they're overly-confident or mean to you: they actually have very little confidence and won't be able to handle you if you're calm and collected; and if they humble and make eye contact: they're actually confident and won't embarrass you no matter what you do
there's an excellent chapter in the book "the pleasure trap" that explains how to deal in social situations when on an alternate diet. Great info in there.
There are no social aspects of this diet, you can go out and eat. Just tell people you don't want the cheese on their salad or the meat with your rice etc.
Some people are jealous of those that have a healthy relationship with food.
It's supposed to be hard! ;)