30 Bananas a Day!

My mother fell of the wagon after one year after watching Freelee Help me please. I'm devastated .

My mom and I adapted the 811 lifestyle after many years of anorexia and eating disorders in the family. I've gone from 32ks to 52 (i guess, I don't weigh myself more) and my mother from around 42 kgs to 50. ( I am 1.59 cm tall and she is around 1.63 cm) - basically we have perfectly ok weights but still carry a little extra for healing. I know this is a phase of healing, I can feel it. We just need to start over and learn to love our bodies to recover.
We have been very active but my mom has still been restrictive (still scared of calories) and when she finally let go and started eating properly she got ill (stomach bloating, colon issue and diarrhea). I've been away for a month and she called me yesterday and told me she was eating chicken. My heart is broken. She told me she had watched a video with free lee getting some deal for a book and just said "this is just another fucking diet and we fell for it, freelee is just like the rest, it's all about money." I don't know what to do. In two h I'll be home and I'm scared. Help me what can I do ?!

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Good point.

As you got more into running and training did they become more open to the idea of improving their health?

I lived with my father for about 2 years and he got inspired by seeing me get up every morning, go for a run, and then eat a healthy diet full of fresh fruits and vegetables.

I got him to change his eating habits at least a bit, and now he eats a lot of fruit, salads, rice, potatoes and lentils.

He also started to exercise on a regular basis, which is cool.

He doesn't have a very strong willpower, though, so he still succumbs and eats junk like cookies, or cheese sandwiches here and there. But at least he learnt what's good and what's not, and he improved quite a lot comparing to what he had been doing before.

My mother also asked me about her diet and I told her about the McDougall's diet, which she adopted in a, maybe, 80%. She still has her doubts about dairy, because her doctor brainwashed her, but I'm trying to convince her to ditch it altogether :)

So yes, I think the best way to inspire others and motivate them to change their bad and unhealthy habits is to lead by example.

Do your thing, walk your talk, and then it's the people who will come at us asking for advice.

yeah you can only do so much. You cant allow there actions to "devastate" you and drag you through the gutter. You cant force them or convince them with some magical compelling argument at the end of the day they have there very own free will. and yeah the consequences of there actions may sting. My own family has made some poor choices but all I can do is distance my emotions from it and try to offer advice etc.. if i'm asked etc.. But i cant allow it to drag me down.

Well. I don't want my family to be carnivorous murderers when they don't need to. I'm just in chock since she is very much educated in this subject. I don't give a shit about weight gain and such but she has for all the majority of her life been battling a terrible disease, gotten a bit better and now relapsed. This is not an imaginary issue. It takes lives. I myself almost lost my life from it. I'm sorry to hear you are living in a war zone. Be safe!

We are talking about two different things here:

1) Your mother decides to eat meat. 

She has all the information she needs, but still wants to eat meat. OK. It sucks, but she is a grown adult who has free will and can decide what to do for herself.

2) Your mother has an eating disorder.

THIS is the serious part. If she can't get better by herself (not everyone can), she should seek medical attention immediately.

Eating disorders can be really serious. I know it by personal experience, so please, if your mother is dealing with anorexia, help her to get medical attention, counselling, etc., even if she doesn't want to (talk to her, explain her that you're worried and care about her health, and she will listen to you!)

All the best,

Martin

+1

PS: It sounds like you would agree that her decision has nothing to do with Freelee "signing a book deal". Freelee should be out signing book deals and being on TV helping people with their health. "We should only listen to the advice of people who make no money off of books" is a silly rule and makes zero sense. The brain surgeon Ben Carson made money off of his book detailing how he was the first surgeon to separate the brains of conjoined twins successfully. Does that somehow cast doubt on the legitimacy of his work? Of course not, he is one of the top surgeons in the world. 

That having been said, I hope that Freelee and Harley do get rich and go live in a giant mansion on the beach somewhere. If they don't deserve it, who does? 

Agree. Freelee and Harley deserves to live like royalty after everything they have done for this planet.

I've never been around anyone with an eating disorder on the skinny end of the spectrum. It's hard to imagine anyone being too skinny but I'm fully aware that it's as serious as obesity just not as prevalent. All I can add is that just keep loving her and trying to convince her to get back on the vegan wagon. Although, if she's not eating in abundance, say at the very least 2,000 calories per day, it's probably not such a bad idea to get calories from somewhere besides fruit and vegetables. I know it's not what you are supposed to say on here but hey, she's going to starve to death on an apple and 3 carrots and a bowl of rice. Not saying that's exactly what she's eating, but it sounds like she's definitely not eating enough. I'm sure you've gone the counseling route before but it sounds like she's got some issues a good psychologist might be able to help. Is she seriously mad at Freelee for signing a book deal? It's a book about eating fruit.....? So her reaction is to not eat fruit because Freelee wants people to eat fruit? That makes no sense at all. Try talking to her and finding out exactly why that pisses her off is my first reaction. Then I'd try to explain how backwards that reaction really is and go from there. If Freelee profits from a book that will help people not eat meat, dairy and eggs, then that's a good thing right? Try to explain that too her and maybe that will help? We'll be praying for you both!

 

Are you into swimming? Ever worked as a lifeguard? Thought it over for a few hours. I only have one thing I can add to what everyone else is saying:

Please view the five pictures below. This is Hana, Hawaii, on the island of Maui, it is one of the most beautiful places that I will ever have gotten to see in my entire life, going there literally takes my breath away.

In photo 3 you see a daredevil jumping off the cliff. Looks pretty risky right? That's you struggling with anorexia/bulimia. People die jumping off cliffs in Hawaii all the time...its always dangerous, but you don't always get hurt cliff diving. At least people jumping off a cliff know what they are getting into. http://www.kpbs.org/news/2014/jun/11/sailor-california-dies-hawaii-...

Photo 5 is the worst though, it doesn't look that dangerous at a glance, but its the last place we want to see you end up. That is the base of 7 sacred pools, where the waterfalls meet the ocean. When I was there a couple on honeymoon drown to death. The wife was so taken with the beauty that she didn't notice the wave come up and sweep here away. She was doomed. Guess what the husband did? Yeah, he tried to go into the water and save his wife...they both died. 

I have been swimming my entire life in heavy ocean conditions...long enough to know that where the ocean waves slam against those rocks right there during a storm, it is treacherous, it means instant death for anyone who falls inside. No one can swim in those waters...no one.... and no one should get anywhere close to them...but they both ended up drowning to death there. As crazy as this sounds...if my wife fell into that pool, I would stand and wait for a break in the waves, or try to get a rope...going in would be suicide.

Get your sh*t together first. Then come back for your mom. That is my advice...its what I had to do, even when it meant not talking to my mother for several years when she was battling her addictions. Now things are much better...our relationship is 100% better than it was ever before, but only because I distanced myself and took care of me first.

http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/01/03/16325763-california-man-...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2659818/Couple-drowns-jumpi...

http://www.weather.com/news/fathers-day-tragedy-couples-drowns-savi...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tag/couple-drowns-saving-dog/

http://www.newstimes.com/local/article/Couple-drowns-on-their-honey...

People drown to death all the time trying to save someone when they should be taking care of themselves first. Don't go out like that. Don't go into the deep and deadly water when you aren't prepared yet. Run and grab a rob, throw a life raft in, learn CPR, become a stronger swimmer, and most importantly, learn the difference between throwing yourself into the rough water at an opportune moment to save someone you love, and suicide by drowning.

Give yourself time to get better. Give yourself time to heal. Build the support group you need. Take care of your mental and spiritual health. Chart your progress. Get the professional help you need. Get the distance you need for a bigger perspective. Work on your relationship with yourself. Find mentors who have been through what you went through and tap them for support, advice, and for accountability.

Then worry about your mom.

Get your sh*t together first. Then come back for your mom. That is my advice...its what I had to do, even when it meant not talking to my mother for several years when she was battling her addictions. Now things are much better...our relationship is 100% better than it was ever before, but only because I distanced myself and took care of me first.

Theres an anology of a guy standing on a stool trying to pull someone else Up onto the stool with him in order to help him out etc.. The person he's trying to pull up almost always sucedes in pulling him down off the stool instead. even if he's 400'lbs and the person below is 100lbs. Why? cause you cant have a good footing on a stool etc... 

so your right gotta get yourself in order first get a good strong firm footing before you go trying to rescue anyone else.

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