30 Bananas a Day!

Hi guys, I'm a complete newbie to this site and have searched the forums for advice on how to respond to people on this subject, but can't find anything immediately so thought I'd just ask!

 

At the moment, responding to non LFRV,  is the single HARDEST part of this new way of life. I have a lot of friends who eat meat, and to whom veganism is just plain wierd so taking it a step further is really difficult for them to understand. They keep asking me to go out for meals and I feel so pressured into caving in, but desperately want to stand my ground without them getting fed up with my high maintenance ways!

How do you guys deal with this?  

 

Help!!!

 

xx

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I don't hang out with people I have recurring and non-constructive conflicts with. If they're OK with me as I am, cool. If not, no reason to hang around. Including family.

 

I'm not particularly social though, so here's hoping someone more social will chime in. I recall seeing plenty of talk on this topic. It's probably Ning's woefully poor search function that didn't turn up any good threads on the subject.

wow Jack, that's harsh! I guess if it works for you though, then that's cool. But it's all about re education for me and I'd like to know how to do that in a non threatening manner. Being inarticulate at the times when it matters most is a problem!!

I'm not threatening at all, in fact I'm probably the nicest guy you could ever meet. Totally non aggressive and mellow as a sun-ripened banana =D Non-violent, too. I have the large, brown, peaceful eyes of a playful sweet puppy and could make Gandhi look like a serious trouble-maker ;-)

 

I just don't stick around when I feel I'm giving more than receiving, and the situation isn't looking to improve. I smile and take my leave. Life's too stupefying to be spent butting heads with people who are not, yet, in a position to accept too much of themselves. I don't mind coming back later if the situation improves.

haha! ok, yea totally get that. sounds easy enough for people you don't really know, or poeple you don't care that much about. But what about your closest/oldest friends though? the ones who you never want to upset? I have a friend who, for a lot of the time when we hang out, we end up going for a curry or some other cooked meal. so, my diet will have a direct impact on her. I havent told her I'm LFRV, just said that curry makes me feel rubbish and that I don't want to eat another, but it's totally skirting the real issue.

Wouldn't know, never been in that position. I suppose I don't care "enough" about anyone, from that point of view. Or maybe I care "too much" about myself to be dishonest, so to speak. I don't socialise with food, it tends to end up in the kind of situations you describe. I enjoy socialising for the sake of socialising, with souls who "transmit on a similar frequency". Go for a walk, sail, throw stones on a beach. Food tends to complicate things for no benefit.

 

Anyway, nothing but full honesty ever works for me. I suppose it's a bit trickier if you've been "someone" and then find out you're becoming "someone else", you may find that difficult to communicate. All the same, my experience is that circling around any issue only makes it more complicated.

I agree with Jack, in that if people REALLY have a conflict with how I live/eat then I REALLY don't want to be around people who don't allow me to make my own decisions, particularly when they're the HEALTHIEST I can make...

 

It's almost like continuing to hang out with people who constantly make you feel bad for not drinking alcohol. Arguably, standard american diet is worse for you than cigarettes and worse for you than alcohol.

 

I don't EVER hang out with people who put up a conflict with me not drinking alcohol, because I know they don't have my best interests at heart... Same goes for people who REALLY put up a conflict (not just questioning/joking but REALLY making me feel bad for my eating choices)... I don't hang out with people who do that, and there ARE people who did that to me :) 

 

Good luck! Congratulations on your new journey of beauty and health :) xx

 

funny you should say that about alcohol, it's the same people who try to make you feel bad for eating healthily as the ones who try to make you feel stupid for not drinking alcohol. I am getting really fed up with the constant barrage of "oh people who don't drink are boring" yadah yadah yadah. feel ike saying - say that to me after a heart attack with the same conviction, i dares ya !

 

The raw vegan lifestyle is the ONLY healthy choice out there, so I am looking forward to how I'll feel in a month, a year.. 10 years?! gotta be infintely better than how I've been feeling lately.. thanks for the lucks :) xx

 

xx

I totally agree. You're on the right path....

 

Remember Evil loves company, the saying is true, don't let people pull you down because they just want a friend to feel terrible with :)

yeah that's what I need, like, automatic, friendly responses. hard data for the REAL discussions! thank you so much Jx
the Livestrong article has some serious errors. the fatty acid synthesis theory is not consistent with what is actually known to happen. Also they make the mistake of considering ice cream a "carb"
Hey Jayney, I hear your woes! I'm a newbie too and have had a lot of nay sayers trying to persuade me to eat "normal food" again. I'm standing my ground very firmly! I'm being very nice not slapping them in the face with vegan bibles... But just saying I'm going to do my own thing!
Last weekend was my brother in laws engagement party, I took bananas with me and ate them throughout the nite, they also had some fruit there that I ate and some salad.
I was offered lots of other food but I just kept saying no thanks!
Also I went out for dinner the other night to a thai restaurant with my husband, his brother (the same BIL from engagement party) and future sister in law and they all ate their SAD food and I ordered a salad! Luckily I new to eat beforehand as I was given a "normal" size bowl of just lettuce leaves and a little raw carrot shredded.
The whole time I was eating I knew everyone was thinking I was a weirdo but I still had a great night out with family and I got to say it's ok I ate... XX bananas before we got here (I think it was about 7).
Just make sure u always got some ripe fruit handy then u won't be tempted to eat SAD food!
IMHO there are many things we can say or not say to non LFRV but once u start seeing the results of staying 811rv long term u won't need to say anything except look at me now!!!
so glad we're in the same boat! Great way to handle it, I'll always make sure I eat before I go to other people houses and things, just in case. If you're not hungry, you're not tempted right? Jx

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