Hi guys, I'm a complete newbie to this site and have searched the forums for advice on how to respond to people on this subject, but can't find anything immediately so thought I'd just ask!
At the moment, responding to non LFRV, is the single HARDEST part of this new way of life. I have a lot of friends who eat meat, and to whom veganism is just plain wierd so taking it a step further is really difficult for them to understand. They keep asking me to go out for meals and I feel so pressured into caving in, but desperately want to stand my ground without them getting fed up with my high maintenance ways!
How do you guys deal with this?
I don't hang out with people I have recurring and non-constructive conflicts with. If they're OK with me as I am, cool. If not, no reason to hang around. Including family.
I'm not particularly social though, so here's hoping someone more social will chime in. I recall seeing plenty of talk on this topic. It's probably Ning's woefully poor search function that didn't turn up any good threads on the subject.
I'm not threatening at all, in fact I'm probably the nicest guy you could ever meet. Totally non aggressive and mellow as a sun-ripened banana =D Non-violent, too. I have the large, brown, peaceful eyes of a playful sweet puppy and could make Gandhi look like a serious trouble-maker ;-)
I just don't stick around when I feel I'm giving more than receiving, and the situation isn't looking to improve. I smile and take my leave. Life's too stupefying to be spent butting heads with people who are not, yet, in a position to accept too much of themselves. I don't mind coming back later if the situation improves.
Wouldn't know, never been in that position. I suppose I don't care "enough" about anyone, from that point of view. Or maybe I care "too much" about myself to be dishonest, so to speak. I don't socialise with food, it tends to end up in the kind of situations you describe. I enjoy socialising for the sake of socialising, with souls who "transmit on a similar frequency". Go for a walk, sail, throw stones on a beach. Food tends to complicate things for no benefit.
Anyway, nothing but full honesty ever works for me. I suppose it's a bit trickier if you've been "someone" and then find out you're becoming "someone else", you may find that difficult to communicate. All the same, my experience is that circling around any issue only makes it more complicated.
I agree with Jack, in that if people REALLY have a conflict with how I live/eat then I REALLY don't want to be around people who don't allow me to make my own decisions, particularly when they're the HEALTHIEST I can make...
It's almost like continuing to hang out with people who constantly make you feel bad for not drinking alcohol. Arguably, standard american diet is worse for you than cigarettes and worse for you than alcohol.
I don't EVER hang out with people who put up a conflict with me not drinking alcohol, because I know they don't have my best interests at heart... Same goes for people who REALLY put up a conflict (not just questioning/joking but REALLY making me feel bad for my eating choices)... I don't hang out with people who do that, and there ARE people who did that to me :)
Good luck! Congratulations on your new journey of beauty and health :) xx
funny you should say that about alcohol, it's the same people who try to make you feel bad for eating healthily as the ones who try to make you feel stupid for not drinking alcohol. I am getting really fed up with the constant barrage of "oh people who don't drink are boring" yadah yadah yadah. feel ike saying - say that to me after a heart attack with the same conviction, i dares ya !
The raw vegan lifestyle is the ONLY healthy choice out there, so I am looking forward to how I'll feel in a month, a year.. 10 years?! gotta be infintely better than how I've been feeling lately.. thanks for the lucks :) xx
I totally agree. You're on the right path....
Remember Evil loves company, the saying is true, don't let people pull you down because they just want a friend to feel terrible with :)