I'm fairly new to the raw till 4 lifestyle and I could really use some advice on how to deal with my family. I've been somewhat doing this lifestyle for almost 4 months and I absolutely love it; but my parents think I'm nuts and we argue almost everyday. They don't mind the fruit and mono meals that I have for breakfast and lunch, its dinnertime thats causing the problems.
I want to prepare my own high carb, no oil meals, but they want me to eat the same meal they are having, which is vegan, but it is full of salt and oil. I feel bad for arguing because they are my parents and they are buying all the fruit for me and I don't want to act like an ungrateful brat (I would buy my own food, but I'm not allowed to get a job since my parents want me to focus on school).
I really want to get the maximum benefits of this lifestyle, but I also want to stop all the fights to stop. What should I do?
family is an all-too-common discussion point here, so try typing "family" into our search engine to see numerous past topics. You're sure to find many tips you can apply to your situation.
Just please remember one thing: your health is worth far more than anyone else's opinion of you.
Your family is vegan?
Yeah, I somehow managed to convince them :)
Thanks! I'm gonna give this a shot
I'm in the exact same boat as you! Except my family aren't vegan unfortunately (I really wish they were). For convenience, mum will mostly let me make my own meals, but a few times a week she takes charge and makes dinner for me, and although it's vegan, it is ALWAYS loads with chemicals, salt, fat, oil and heaps of other nasties. And just by being forced to eat these meals, my digestion becomes a complete wreck. It has actually gotten to the point a few times where I've gotten diarrhea (gross, I know, but it's all because of what she feeds me!). I just wish that they could understand what I go through every time I get forced to eat a meal that isn't in line with this lifestyle. I completely understand what your going through, and I know what it's like to get sick of the arguments and all the stress it causes. I'm sorry, I don't really have any advice, other than stick with your believes and your conviction, that's what I'm having to do. One day, we will both get there xxx
Thank you so much for your reply! After all the arguments with family and friends, it really means a lot to know that someone understands. I can totally relate to the digestion fiasco these types of meals can cause, I experience it everyday since mom ALWAYS cooks (shes a chef). I guess for now I just have to do what you are doing and stick with my beliefs and hopefully with enough persistence I can change their views. Just wish there was a better way to educate them about the benefits of this lifestyle.
Me too! It also annoys me that it's a constant struggle for me to get enough fresh fruit and veg, as because I'n the only one in the family who eats such large amounts of it, mum doesn't buy too much when she goes shopping. So I end up buying a lot for myself, but even though I really really REALLY want to be eating raw all the time, I end up having to eat potatoes or rice as there simply isn't enough for me otherwise. And I hate it! I find cooked food so tasteless and boring compared to raw food! I just wish I was born into a family of fruit bats! haha
I can completely relate, my mum is convinced that you neeed 'healthy oils' in your diet and i dont know what to say other than that you really don't need them and it's frustrating coz I dont want to be annoying and be constantly nagging her to not use oil but she's been using it her whole life in cooking so I dont know how to make her realise that its not nesscasary.
Just tell your mom that you'd rather get your "oils" from the original plant source that isn't HIGHLY processed! Avocado oil= just eat avocado with all nutrients intact, olive oil= eat some olives, there are LOTS of varieties with nutrients intact.
Show them how to cook meals that you will actually eat. Take the time to learn to cook healthy meals. Show them the alternative options. Make it clear...I eat a diet low in salt and low in fat, that is why my diet works. If they are going to eat a high fat vegan diet, it can potentially be disastrous for their health, so if they decide to do that to themselves, you can't do it to yourself no matter what. I'm tried it for years and it was terrible.
Can you have a salad with them? just salad... then you eat your cooked carbs, before or after...
eat a small portion with them if they force you, that way you don't over consume oil and salt...
Sometimes is necessary to do things like that, i know its not being 100% 'transparent' with them, but there's things you can't force them to understand, maybe they really don't understand, so that way you don't waste yourself trying to explain them over and over again the same situation... try one more time, show them the book 80 10 10, what happens with sugar absorption in blood and excess fat, show them oil is not necessary because it's a processed 'thing' (not even a food) that has been separated from the rest of the food, show them documentaries, and be very honest on why you want to do it, maybe they are just scared that you have some 'eating disorder' or may be lacking some nutrient, tell them that you can go check with a doctor on blood tests, and of course show them some convincing study talking about dangers of processed salt and any salt, and if they don't get it, then don't force them and don't try anymore... just do what you have to do before diner with them, or after. But try showing how important it is for you, that is not just a 'thing' you are doing or trying, that theres plenty of people in the world that is doing it and believing in this with all the scientific research to back it up.
Print out this article along with the references and show it to your Ma: Essential Fat Deficiency Is Essentially Unknown