30 Bananas a Day!

Ahhh! I am all over the place lately emotionally. I got off my birth control (moved to the Lady Comp and love it!) and have been eating high raw LF for the past two months. I am eating about 1 or 2 cooked meals per week, but some of them are not the highest quality :( (all vegan though). I go out with my boyfriend to get dinner and end up eating a bit of processed food about once a week. I am experiencing mood swings much more than I have in the past. I am still on anti-depressants for my PMDD (which gets worse when I am off of birth control) and will be until I get it under control (meaning that I have been LFRV for a year and I feel confident attempting to get off of the meds). Any suggestions for the mood swings and how to deal with detox? I'm freaking out on my boyfriend and don't want to scare him away. Any suggestions would be great!

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i think durian rider would say you are dehydrated or undercarbed!

Hey,

I recently quit birth control & antidepressants also. I took Celexa for 3.5 years and birth control for 9 years! I had to deal with a lot of detox/rebalancing as well, especially the first 1-2 months, but my body is still not completely over it. I still get mood swings and have not had a menstrual cycle yet. I've been off the pills for like 3-4 months now.

It does get easier to manage. You just have to ride out all the negativity, realize that it's not your fault, and be gentle with yourself. Pursue things that make you happy, and avoid things that stir up those negative feelings. For me, all of my negative feelings seem to be interconnected - when something makes me angry, I dwell on it, and then I start thinking of other things that make me unhappy, and I end up getting sad, and self-hatey, which makes me more angry, etc. It's a pretty vicious cycle to get caught up in, and it's really hard to break. I'm not saying that I've figured it out, just that I struggle too, but I've found a few things that help.

I keep a little notebook which I have dubbed my "happy place". Every day I jot down a few things that I like, or that make me happy, or things I am grateful/thankful for. Some days I have only one or two, some days take up entire pages. I don't let any negative thoughts enter my notebook, even though sometimes when I'm writing in it, I find ways to be bitter or cynical about what I'm writing. And that's fine. We are allowed to have those feelings - it is what we do with them, how we act on them, that matters. Anyway, the point of the notebook is that sometimes when I am feeling like I hate the whole world, or the whole world hates me, I can look inside and be reminded that I actually have a lot to be thankful for, a lot to be happy about, and that I am more than just my emotions - they come and go, but they don't control me.

I also found a lot of solace in the book "Anger" by Thich Nhat Hanh. It has Buddhist leanings, but I think that no matter what path you walk, if you struggle with out of control emotions sometimes, this book will introduce different ways for you think about it, so that it doesn't threaten to take over your life.

I definitely have an anger problem, and that is the root of my depression. But by learning to work WITH my emotions, instead of ignoring them, or letting them drown me, I've been able to find a place where I am generally content with my life, and when I do have bouts of depression I am able to recognize that nothing may have caused it - if you struggle with depression too I'm sure you know what I mean, sometimes you just spiral into a foul mood for no reason - and realizing that my negative emotions have no real basis (for example, I have a job, an apartment, I can afford to feed myself and pay bills on time, and have hobbies that I enjoy - basically, I can't reasonably ask for much more, as I am much luckier than some people) makes it easier to acknowledge them, and dismiss them.

I also tend to take my anger/frustration out on my boyfriend, simply because he is the closest person to me, and I love him and trust him, and I go to him to seek comfort. It's important to make sure he understands that even when you are angry/sad/anxious/etc, it is not his fault, and that you talk to him because you need his help and support, not because he is the cause of your emotions. The flip side of this is that when he offers support or advice, PLEASE do not let yourself make any snotty comeback to him. I am guilty of this, because when I'm feeling down, I feel like I'll never be happy again, and all advice that anyone gives me seems stupid because if I can't control my own moods, how can somebody else tell me how to do it better? If you feel that you can't talk to him without becoming angry or negative, then tell him so. "I'm very angry right now, and I might say something I'll regret. Let's talk about this later. I am not upset with you, but I am having a hard time controlling my emotions right now."

It gets easier, and the more you practice being mindful of your emotions, the easier it becomes, and the quicker you can recognize what moods you are in, and how to handle it.

I hope any of this made sense... I tend to ramble on and on. If you have any questions, or just want to talk, feel free to PM me or whatever. :)

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