This is a safe place for those who really, really, REALLY want to succeed in a LFRV lifestyle but the journey is just a little harder for us. We want to get there…we need to get there…and we WILL get there! Through support and encouragement and empathy, we can come here and share our struggles, scrutinize why we sometimes fall, get what we need to pick ourselves back up again, and have a cheerleading section who has our back every step of the way.
No one here is giving up! We know and understand and believe on every level that this is the path we need to be on to get the results we're after. But personal demons challenge us and we can't always see past the illusion. If we end up making poor choices, this is where we come to confess, analyze and get the motivation through the help of others to dust ourselves off and commit again, a little stronger each time.
Some of us are here with valid overeater/binge demons. Others of us have other types of mental/emotional disadvantages. For anyone here, there is a struggle involved.
What's amazing about the folks in this group is that we really believe in this path and are determined to get there. We haven't given up, we're not quitting! We just really need this support group and each other.
Because this is a safe haven for "struggling with the struggle," we want group members to feel safe. Please keep comments inspirational and kind. The LFRV community really needs the voice of those who made it despite the odds!
Location: Anywhere there is struggle!
Members: 78
Latest Activity: Apr 30
Started by mckohtz. Last reply by Cheryl T Apr 18. 6 Replies 0 Likes
I'm finding hard to eat 80/10/10 especially with a family that doesn't, but also with some of the symptoms I have with it. I can do it for breakfast but if I do pure 80/10/10 for a day or two, I get…Continue
Started by Jamie werneburg. Last reply by Christine Carey Apr 2. 20 Replies 0 Likes
Im new here...This is my second time going raw. My husband nor my kids are raw, so i still have to cook, buy, and watch them eat all my favorite foods. Its so hard but i really want this for myself.…Continue
Started by Desiree Nichole. Last reply by Desiree Nichole Mar 30. 2 Replies 0 Likes
hello hello.. i am new to this site. i am so glad i came across it.. My Name is Desiree. or Dez.. I am almost 32, mom of 2 kids ages 10 and 7!! i am slowly making my way into vegetarian, then wanna…Continue
Started by Rawfully Yours Mar 24. 0 Replies 0 Likes
I cant seem to keep my fat at 10%. I mean I know what to do...or not to do...but cant seem to do it consistantly. I attribute this to chocolate addiction and occasional non grain bread...that has to…Continue
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8/23/2012, Day 7. On 8/16 I weighed 200 lbs. on the digital scale at the Y. On 8/23 I weighed 195. I am pleased with a 5 lb. weight loss in week I, but I am also pleased that I have worked the first three steps in the first 7 days of my recovery.
I feel that so long as I am doing what I have done (one day at a time) for the past week, I will arrest my obesity-related chronic, degenerative diseases and achieve "Nirvana." However, I realize that this program will not make me rich or famous--and it will not get me laid. Nirvana is only a state of health, wellness, sanity, serenity, peace and contentment--with no fear of death--and no feeling of alienation from Man or God. Most people don't want it. They prefer to be rich and famous--or to get laid.
Step Three talks about God. Gandhi says that there is no God but Truth. I believe that Step Three is a lifelong search for Truth. Can I moderate SAD? Do diets work? Can I overcome cravings by renouncing addictive substances? Does my delusion that I am an important person cause my own problems?
My Step Three is a process of turning my life over to the pursuit of Truth. For example, I no longer go to OA meetings, because I've tried moderating SAD with a measuring cup and scale and it doesn't work for me! I've tried three moderate meals; moderate portion sizes, grey sheet, etc., and nothing they do in OA works for me. I believe that it is insanity or foolishness to continue doing something that doesn't work--even when I know it doesn't work.
For me, working Step Three amounts to turning my life and my will over to the Truth; and that means getting out of OA, AA, alanon and 12 step programs if I need to look for support for becoming a 100% LFRV. Step Three, for me, means accepting the fact that when I begin trying to overcome selfishness, self-centeredness, gluttony, greed, pride, lust and other problems that cause my suffering--that I need to get out of AA, OA, and alanon--because the only thing they are willing to talk about there is eating moderate amounts of SAD, not drinking, and how to have good relationships with drunks! God!! There's gotta be more to life that that! I don't want to get into arguments when I say that I don't eat meat, dairy, sugar...and don't associate with drunks!
I've come to realize that plant-based, whole foods are the only H/P I need to overcome obesity-related, chronic, degenerative diseases.
And, the only protection I need from cancer, diabetes, cardiovascular disease(s) is complete renunciation/entire abstinence from SAD. Step One is my shield and my buckler: my defense from all the craziness out there!
I believe I can do both those things without all the B/S that goes with a diet; without all the brainwash that I hear all over the place.
This ain't rocket science!
DAY FIVE,
I've now worked REVISED STEP ONE for 4 days and lost 4 lbs. I'm sure it was water weight and binge weight--but it feels better. I started at 200 lbs. on 8/16 and now weigh 196 on 8/20.
REVISED STEP ONE
What I say is my own opinion. I am working my own program, not someone else's. I am sharing my own experience, strength and hope here, not someone else's. I hope that no one will try to "play the Director," play the sponsor I don't have, or play god in my life. I prefer to share with others, then choose my own Truth, cafeteria style. I don't try to shove anything down anyone else's throat, and I hope no one will try to do that to me.
My latest slip shows that I need to tighten my Step One in order to be protected from such a thing happening in the future, as follows.
"I admit that I am powerless over the Western diet and sedentary lifestyle (WDSL)--in all its forms and guises--as well as all the people, places and things that promote, advertise and support WDSL--that my life is apparently 100 times more unmanageable than I thought it was."
Therefore, I voluntarily take the following vows, in order to protect myself from WDSL:
No alcohol, tobacco, drugs, or prescription medications;
No dairy, animal products, fats or oils;
No nuts or seeds or avocado;
No sugar, salt, chemicals, preservatives or unknown ingredients of any kind in my food;
No grains, processed or prepared food of any kind.
There! So now I can't eat ANYTHING but plant-based, whole foods! I don't get to have any fun, or any friends! My definition of Step One, in other words is pretty much identical with "100% LFRV," except that I eat fermented veggies and fruits that have dropped on the floor, in order to get lots of bacteria in my gut. This process helps my autoimmune system to build up defenses against all the bacteria in my gut. In this way, I don't have to worry about an infection, illness or problem from any germs, bacteria, molds or fungus that I've already built up an immunity to. The more the merrier, as far as the germs, bacteria, molds and fungus I get exposed to, that's my motto! The stronger the better is my motto as to my auto-immune system!
AW NUTS!!!
I have, once again, had a slip; and I have started my recovery again at Step One. My slip was 8/15 and my new Day One was 8/16.
I believe that one reason for my slip was that I am preparing to be a Pro Se litigant in U.S. district court, and the stress and emotions connected with that may have caused me to cross the boundary between safe food and comfort food in order to soothe my emotions.
In order to protect myself hereafter I am tightening the boundaries of my Step One to be sure I do not cross any imaginary lines and find myself in trouble with an addiction.
My slip was innocent enough. I worked out at the Y and was hungry away from home, so I stopped in at Fred Meyers and bought 3 apples, 3 kiwis, and a bag of nuts....
When I took a handfull of nuts, I bit down on something that was not a nut. It was apparently a deep-fried, sugar-coated piece of toasted dough, covered in cinnamon to make it look like a nut.
With the first bite I was trapped. I felt what is described in AABB under the experiences of Jim and Fred; what is described in the AABB on the first page of "More About Alcoholism." I felt like a fish that had taken the bait and then felt the hook in his mouth.
I finished the "nuts" and headed for the bus stop, but wound up in a local restaurant eating vegetable yakisoba! When I got off the bus I walked across the street and had a Subway Special Foot-long sandwich!!! Then I stopped in a grocery for a TV dinner and a coke to eat at home!!!!!!
It was just like somebody had slipped alcohol in my milk! Without thinking; without a mental defense, I started eating comfort food!
Dovima,
I first intended to say nothing; not to respond to your last post. However, I believe it would be more honest for me to tell you my response to your last post, which is addressed to me.
I thought you just returned from an OA retreat; that you must be an active OA member, and your post to me seems to confirm that. All of my posts have explained that I do not respect the approach that OA takes to food, spirituality, the steps, or anything else! Please do not lecture me on OA. My first OA meeting was Jan 1, 1978. I've had all the OA I can stand.
I have not asked you to sponsor me. You seem to be posting as my sponsor here, which is a mistake.
I do not respect your lecture on negativity, etc., etc., etc.
I was disappointed with your post to me. You may post whatever and whenever you wish, about anything you wish to say, obviously; but I respectfully request that you do not address them to me. I thought I had made this clear in my earlier posts. Apparently not so, which is the reason that I hope to make it clear at this time.
No hard feelings. I simply do not appreciated being lectured. Thank you.
Thank you, Anabea, for sharing your experience, strength and hope with me, and allowing me to share mine. I relate absolutely to what you have said here.
I cannot be spiritual while a sponsor with 27 years of sobriety is blowing smoke in my face and bragging that he has the courage to die sober from cancer--but not the willingness to quit smoking! I am not interested in the ""suggestions" that an OA sponsor who has lost 100 lbs. (temporarily), but still outweighs me by 50 lbs. may have about cutting my slice of pizza in half...or an OA sponsoree who walks away from me when I suggest to him that he abstain entirely from processed foods!
I don't think it is "negative" for me to tell the truth about what works for me and what does not work for me--and I don't like to be criticized by someone because what works for them is different from what works for me. Therefore, I forgive you for being "negative"! In fact, I do not believe that what you said was "negative." I think it was "truth."
I believe that Truth is relative; that it may be different for everybody--and still be truth. Therefore, I don't need to spend a year experimenting with cutting my pizza in half because somebody said for me to do that.
Perhaps you should forgive me for "bristling" when someone with the kind of program I don't want tells me what to do! I should be more like a saint or a monk, but I'm not. I have to be where I am and grow up on my own time...sadly, I'm already 68 y/o so I may not have enough time left to grow up!
However, I have spent enough time arguing with AA, OA and alanon people. I simply don't want to spend any more time debating those old arguments. In fact, I read a Buddhist Sutra last night where Buddha says, "The greatest protection and the first step on the path to Nirvana is to live apart from fools"! I should not say this...but I'm going to...I will regret it...but I'm going to say it.... It will get me in trouble with over half the membership of this group--but then I'll know who my friends are--and who they are not! Anyway, I believe that OA is a support group for fools and AA is a fellowship of smokers. It doesn't work for me to take suggestions from most of the people I have met in AA, OA, and alanon! We're just not the same kind of people!
Hopefully, I can find one or two people like me here in 30 BAD.
I feel very sorry that you feel the need to be so "positive" and "grateful" for any recovery in 12 step programs in order to be "accepted" and "not judged" in 30 BAD. I wish I could be where you are at, but I am slightly angry that I have been given misinformation, sick role models, and "no support" for 68 years! My Step Five will need to answer the question, "what should I have done instead" as to that resentment.
Comment by Dovima on August 18, 2012 at 1:38am Lee and anabea...........I was just going to let that go, but on behalf of newcomers, these issues need addressed. Honestly, Lee Mack, when I've read your various postings on 30BAD for the last couple of months, I've wondered if you have been diagnosed with a personality disorder.......? I see a lot of people going through the negativity you are walking through, and I've been there myself. But I decided to grow up and get over it. You keep saying "They" like there's an official committee trying to control what you say and do- that's in your head. Why are you having a hard time figuring out that Alcoholics Anonymous is to help people to abstain from drinking? As an analogy, do you go grocery shopping at Home Depot? Do people come to 30BAD to learn how to eat the paleo diet? It's pretty clear to me that different places/groups have different functions. It is what it is, and people who have made the decision to heal from alcoholism are happy to go to Alcoholics Anonymous. Please don't go- you are wasting the time of people there who are serious about helping themselves and others deal with this fatal disease.
No kidding Overeaters Anonymous isn't there to support you as a raw vegan. That's not the function. There is so much bickering and turmoil with-in this community on the details of this diet; OA seeks to avoid that by telling people they need to go to a nutritionist and figure out their own diet plan. While OA supports physical recovery from compulsive overeating, the organization focuses on spiritual/ emotional recovery as well. If you can get that from the Internet, more power to you. I need real people in real life; I need hugs and eye contact and friendship and accountability, not the anonymity and isolation that is an integral part of the Internet experience.
I showed up to OA broken, after of years of failing at being a raw vegan. I'm now doing significantly better. I could have looked around with a critical eye and found everything wrong with the meetings and people there, but I was looking for the solution instead. Yes, I see people who have gone to OA for years and are still heavy set, but I also know many people who have lost one to two hundred pounds and have maintained that weight loss for years. I know if I can't find my place with-in a non-religous, spiritual group, I need to step back and humble my ego. I am willing to get out of my comfort zone and end the isolation that emotionally shut me down.
Another reason OA is working for me is that I have a willingness to take suggestions. I meditate, pray, call other people, read spiritual literature, work with a sponsor, do steps, etc. Ultimately, 12-step recovery isn't for people who need it, nor even those who want it, but for people who are willing to do the work.
So, Lee Mack, step away from the 12 step world! I give you permission...... you are only spreading negativity, and there are vulnerable people around who want to change for the better who deserve to see that it truly works. Wouldn't the group for eating disorders be a better fit for you?
Comment by anabea on August 17, 2012 at 9:17pm What an interesting discussion. @Lee - I have experienced much of the same. There is so much to say about this topic, but it would sound negative and I don't want to write that.
In essence, I am looking for a spiritual program that would heal me physically too. I believe it is all connected. I want to eat the most amazing foods on the planet that have the highest vibration and the most healing capacity, while using spirituality to heal my soul. For me, I can not have one without the other.
I do believe this lowfat raw vegan program is for me. I feel good on it, positive, alive and "light." I have found that it is hard to get rid of the behaviors from the past. And there - is my work. Transitioning has brought up every weakness I have. I am loving this journey! Frustrating as it is, I think it is so worth it. I have learned more in this past year then all my other years of studying nutrition combined.
The spiritual part needs to be here too. I can not heal spiritually without having the food in place. I can not heal spiritually while smoking, indulging in toxic foods and other behaviors that are "ok" in other programs. This is going to sound horribly judgmental, so please forgive me, but it was not appealing to me to walk into "the rooms" and smell the after effects of cigarettes and see how people were literally getting more and more heavy while claiming to be "sober." I understand that it is a process, but that just doesn't work for me. Please, I don't want to offend anyone.
I am so grateful to the 12 steps, the big book, and all the healing that those programs have done. Truly miraculous. I just couldn't find my place.
When I coach, if I am allowed, I try to work on both of these fronts, the spiritual and the physical. I try, if I am allowed to have both sides in my room.
Thanks for bringing all of this up.
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