Who is single?

Just wondering...

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Permalink Reply by Matthew de Haast on November 29, 2010 at 3:05pm

Great way to look at it Chris. Thanks for the insight :)

Peace
Mat

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Permalink Reply by Don Bennett on November 30, 2010 at 12:51am

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I shared this someone recently and it might be good to share it here too.

As part of my relationship research (which I've done a lot of, including opening my own health-conscious dating service) I always talk to elderly couples who hold hands. One of the questions I ask them is, "Did you ever have to work at the relationship, or was it easy for the most part?" And I consistently hear from those still-hand-holding couples that it was easy. "Ever any rough patches?" I never got a 'yes' on this one. That's not saying that there are never any disagreements or differences of opinion, but these don't foster ill-feelings or tempers or other negative emotions as they do in relationships what are ultimately not going to work out (even if the two people stay together).

Another question I ask of these elderly hand-holding couples, "When did you know that you'd be spending the rest of your lives together?" And I never heard, "It was love at first sight". Instead, across the board the answer was always something to the effect of it was love at first getting-to-know-each-other, which happened within a very short period of time, days usually. Very telling.

So when I say that one of my criteria in a relationship is to still be holding hands when we're in the winter of our lives, I've got a pretty good idea of what's necessary for this to happen. And yes, shared values and philosophies are very important, more so than shared interests it seems.

A word about "soul-mates": If you do find your soul-mate, then by definition, you are the other person's soul-mate... in-other-words, both people need to be each others soul-mate for either one to be the others soul-mate. So if you find a soul-mate, it is unlikely that there will be constant bickering and yelling... I think this happens in relationships where the two people are not each others soul-mates, and they "hooked up" for a reason other than "true love" (although they might have thought they were in love).
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Permalink Reply by Tobias on November 3, 2012 at 7:11am

I just became single, and I couldn't have felt more free :D

Diet wasn't the #1 issue why I broke up with my exgf. Different paths in life was.
Though she was accepting of what I started doing, BUT she didn't want to know anything about it and was gravitating towards the "carbs are bad" and "I could never stop going to McD" things while complaining about her weight and health. I had suggestions for her, but there was a strong "nanananana I can't hear you" attitude at some times... this contributed to me being tired of it.

It took me a while to let go but now it's such a relief. I can go about my own ways and I just don't have time anymore for people who keep being negative in my life.

To Freedom!

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Permalink Reply by Derek on November 9, 2012 at 9:59pm

I've been 'single' for a few years now and it has been wonderful! It's given me the opportunity to grow and experience new places and people. Able to fully invest in whatever I have done. Would be great to find a special someone too ;)