One of the more common types of posts we see here on 30BaD belong to a certain type of approach, and I'd like to take a moment to explain why it is nonsense.
We see over and over again the idea that "I failed, fell off the wagon, slipped up, gave in, caved... and now I'm starting over!"
Let's have a look at this and see if we can't help correct this flawed approach.
Say you set out to climb a mountain, and after an hour of hiking you step on a loose rock and slip. You stumble and fall and scratch your knee. For a moment you hold your knee, wipe off the blood and then you stand up. Now, upon standing up, do you say to yourself: "I failed!! I fell, and now I have to start all over again!"
Of course you don't. Because even though you fell, you're still an hour into the ascent! You're not back at the beginning; you're not back to selecting the mountain or buying your gear, or driving to base camp. You're an hour into the ascent! And so you pick yourself up and continue climbing, knowing that all you lost was a few minutes and a little blood and sweat, and being a mountain climber you know it's totally natural to stumble here and there, and totally natural to lose a little blood and sweat along the way.
The essential problem with the "I failed" approach is a psychological one, and all that is required to correct it, is a little tweaking of our perspective. When you feel the first stirrings of 'failure mentality' creeping into your thoughts, remind yourself of where you are, how far you've come. When you go a week of HCRV and then you have a cooked meal, remind yourself of the week of HCRV, put the cooked meal (the scratched knee) behind you and continue on, unabated!, all the more experienced at climbing!
So this is my message to all of you who beat yourselves up, who falsely imagine that the cooked meal you had last night was akin to hitting the reset button, and the message is this:
Stand up, dust yourself off, and keep climbing! The rest of the ascent is still in front of you, and the summit still awaits!
"The only failure is the one we name as such"
See also: Why it's ok to "screw up" at first, by Apollonia
This post get my vote for a welcome wagon post. Thanks.
Permalink Reply by Izwel on May 20, 2012 at 5:42pm I ended up in a restruant the other day and ate ribs and cornbread.
I woke up the next morning feeling like a slump, so I jumped out of bed thinking, I'll get this fixed up right now, I'm going to eat a ton of organic fruit and veggies today, I'm going to clear some trails in the woods to get my body moving and sweating to clear this s*** out asap. I told myself today is an awesome day, I will not let this get me down, i will not lay in bed and feel sorry for myself today. And I had a wonderful day.
If anything the s*** food sickness has become a motivator for me to get as clean and fresh as possible, to get right up and face the day with passion, to do my best to stay one step further away from the ribs and corn bread. Just like the horrible drug experiences became the motivation for me to come clean.
realizing our illness is the perfect opportunity to become well. SMILE!
Peace and Health,
Izwel
Permalink Reply by Jon Fergus on May 22, 2012 at 2:40am Hi Izwel. Glad this post helped you.
One thing I recommend to people is that they spend some time really investigating the ethical side of veganism. Ethical vegans have made an inward vow that they will not participate in the expoitation of animals - a sentiment that arises from compassion and empathy, which, along with growing their hearts, also helps when/if they 'slip' on this lifestyle - because when they do eat cooked food, it's cooked vegan food, which is going to have far less of a negative impact on both your health and, obviously, on animal life. The lower impact on your health allows you to more easily return to 811 after a 'slip'.
Glad to hear you're becoming motivated by the inevitable phood sickness. Keep on moving in the right direction :)
Permalink Reply by Janna Bannanna on July 19, 2012 at 8:34am
Permalink Reply by Jon Fergus on July 19, 2012 at 4:09pm Great lyrics. Glad this post helps - I certainly know the idea has helped me in my journeys!
Permalink Reply by Freshtival on July 19, 2012 at 12:56pm
I think there are two factors in discipline and decision making. In the right now moment you decide if your going to put good for you food in your mouth or if your going to put bad for you food in your mouth. The other factor is momentum. The longer you have been deciding one way or the other the more likely you are to continue on with the same habit.
Permalink Reply by Jon Fergus on July 19, 2012 at 4:22pm Nice observation. I think the same. And it's not just the longer that we've been making those decisions, but the strength and power we put behind them that builds the momentum. A powerful choice, with the full import of our Will can stop old habits in their tracks and begin the establishment of new, more productive habits. Strong willed choices can propel us forwards, leaving old, weak willed habits in the dust. :-)
Permalink Reply by Ana on July 20, 2012 at 5:38am Say you set out to climb a mountain, and after an hour of hiking you step on a loose rock and slip. You stumble and fall and scratch your knee. For a moment you hold your knee, wipe off the blood and then you stand up. Now, upon standing up, do you say to yourself: "I failed!! I fell, and now I have to start all over again!"
I love it! This is wonderful 'take' on the situation. Thanks, Jon. Well done. ...ana xoxo
Permalink Reply by Harriët Waninge on September 18, 2012 at 9:05pm thanks! this helps me a lot!
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