Just want to know how many of you here are attached to someone who is also leading the same lifestyle as you and how that affects your relationship? It seems pretty damn hard to find someone who is on the same journey as me or at least wants to jump on the wagon for a ride...I guess i'm just wondering if any of you here are going through the same frustrations and how are you overcoming them...
- lonely banana lover
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Permalink Reply by Steffi Ann on April 29, 2012 at 8:19pm I don't think a diet should determine whom we love. Of course, it makes live easier, if your partner is on 80 10 10 or at least vegan. But if he or she is the right one, you'll work around your lifestyle differences.
My boyfriend isn't even vegetarian, and we met when I was still on a SAD diet myself. He accepts the fact that I don't want to live like this anymore. We still stand in the kitchen together, prepare our dinners and eat together. Eating different things doesn't mean you can't enjoy each others company. I also add some hclf cooked foods and am learning to make lovely dishes which we share together. So, he is learning and very accepting of the vegan lifestyle.
I wouldn't let a lifestyle stop you from being with someone you really like. It only becomes a problem when your partner does not accept your choices.
Lots of love, xox
Steffi
Permalink Reply by Athena on April 29, 2012 at 10:03pm That's great when you can live with each other with such differences Steffi. Though I understand (and accept) that it is different for every individual. Everyone must know for themselves what they can and can't handel in a relationship.
I know that a non-vegan or anyone not tolerant towards 811, someone who smokes, drinks or does drugs or someone who would try to force me to have kids would NOT work for me at all because such things go completely against my soul principles.
I refuse to sacrifice my limits just to make someone happy. That is why certain requirements are crucial for me.
Permalink Reply by Steffi Ann on April 29, 2012 at 10:23pm Yes, you're right. But I do believe that acceptance takes us a long way. And I also believe that people come into your live for a certain reason. I'm teaching him that a vegan lifestyle is great - he's actually agreed to go on mcdougalls 12-day-programm which is a great start. 80 10 10 raw would probably just be overwhelming for him. But so far I can say: no more dead animals in our pans! love that! but he still eats ham and cheese which I don't like. But so what, everything comes at its time, and I can only be there and guide him towards veganism, not even asking him to go completely fruit. And I love him, so the challenge is worth it :-)
So, for VeggieLover my advice is: just listen to your heart, don't let a lifestyle get in your way and take it step by step. Most people know the advantages of a vegan life - they're just too scared to leave their comfort zone. Be a teacher if necessary :-)
Permalink Reply by VeggieLover on April 30, 2012 at 11:47am I totally agree with you, but speaking from my previous relationship the guy wasn't too supportive of my lifestyle, even critical if so, and that really put a downer on the relationship...hence why I told myself the next guy im letting into my life has to at least be into somewhat of a healthy active lifestyle, someone who is at least open to listening and trying things out.... someone who wants to feel and look better in a healthier way. I know the universe has this magical thing of bringing you what you ask of it...so here i am asking the universe to bring me a soul that is open, kind, loving and accepting. :)
Permalink Reply by Chris Califano on April 29, 2012 at 10:54pm I had the same food prep thing with my girlfriend 12 years ago. I was eating cooked carbs for dinner at the time. She transitioned almost overnight while I chose to "ramp" it over six months. Interestingly, seven years later she went two steps backwards into bad food choices while I only went further and stronger. But the different food preps and personal meals did not put a strain on our relationship. Like Steffi pointed out, diet does not determine love. Luckily my gf in this example and myself were both almost total natural hygiene as well (no garlic onion salt spices etc) so we did not gross each other out. Granted, that could be a factor that makes a person's diet choices intolerable .
Permalink Reply by Chris Califano on April 29, 2012 at 10:17pm If you wait for a fruitie to come along then you had better be mighty patient. I've posted about this before. The key is to create them. That's right. In your "fruit laboratory". The main thing is to choose someone who sparks your chemistry, and you enjoy each other. The diet part is "easy", if you use your vibrant example plus you know how to seduce with food. As Chase touched on, you have to learn how to make some raw comfort food dishes that literally taste better than cooked. If your love interest is not vegan yet (most women want to be; many men will come around too if the women put a little effort in, and appeal to their reasoning) Most important is to have them try it, and see their physical performance in all areas improve. Everyone loves to feel good, so this is a no brainer!
(Lfrv or Hclf men have a huge advantage. In my experience, 90% of womyn in general would love to meet a man who does not stink when he sweats, has plenty of energy, is always smiling and never complaining, and who exudes health while concerned about all life on the planet. )
So finding a love interest is no different than when you are cooked... Listen, when you are luckier and more blessed to have evolved this way, then you have the burden to put some loving effort in to get what you want in terms of love.
If you can not stand the way they smell and taste then just have fun in other more creative ways until you have "transformed" them or "created your monster".... good things come to those who wait. And what better foreplay anyway?
Permalink Reply by Athena on April 29, 2012 at 10:28pm If this is directed at me, I have all the time in the world. I rush nothing. :)
As a non-gourmet (mostly raw) lowfat vegan who doesn't bother with recipes at all, I have no desire to make dishes for others - it's stressful and I think that's something everyone should do for themselves (unless they are ill or in any other way unable to provide for themselves).
^^I may come across as an arrogant selfish b**** with my statement, but it is not meant to hurt, I am just being honest. I have my reasons for not engaging into gourmet recipes and always providing for myself/only eating my own foods (vegan - mostly raw) and since I found this way of eating, I am much happier and I feel so much healthier - physically and psychologically.
For people that like to make gourmet dishes - whether for themselves or for others, that's fine. I accept that, but I also expect them to accept my choices. When both sides can accept, then is everything peaceful and harmonious. :)
^^Hopefully I'm making sense.
Permalink Reply by Chris Califano on April 29, 2012 at 10:38pm I was not even thinking of your comment. I did not even see it when I wrote mine. I agree with you, for my own diet. But sometimes we may choose to exert some effort when we want to help someone transition. I am not bragging when I tell you that I have changed some lives. And these were not clients who found my raw wellness center; I am talking about those I met who had no intention whatsoever about being raw let alone vegan, let alone lfrv. You can say whatever you please- I have zero conflict with this topic. I am at peace since I know how to solve "the problem" of how to handle those who do not eat this way that we are either in a relationship with, or desire to be. I was just sharing my experience.
Permalink Reply by Max Waters on April 29, 2012 at 11:52pm If i could find someone who's into the food I am, i'd follow them to the ends of the earth ^^
Permalink Reply by VeggieLover on April 30, 2012 at 11:50am like! :)
Permalink Reply by vegan witch Ⓥ on April 30, 2012 at 12:11am if your not vegan then you dont come near me - i dont do dead corpse sacks on two legs.
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