some of you might now my past, some not. I have had a hard time sticking to 811, but in that time I have learned so much about myself and my mechanisms.
I have been able to stick for 4-7 days then binging hard on really bad- high fat and even dairy sometimes. Even though I ate around 3000 a day.
Now it seems that the emotional reason behind it, is much more controlled since I am aware of the patterns. But then, I started experimenting, thinking that I do not need that many calories because then I would gain (you would think I would know better after almost a year, but apparatnly not). So for about one month I have averidged around 2000 cals a day I think with some potatoes and a bit of vegan dishes sometimes. I have probably eaten a vegan dish 3-4 times in that month. And I have been able to control the pattern of the old binging habbits. Until yesterday. I felt so drained, lethargic and depressed and I had massive cravings for high fat cooked food. so I feel in and now the cravings are just so intense.
I stopped doing any hard exersize to give my body a rest, what I have been doing is 1 hour astanga yoga 4-5 times a week and a bit of biking, maybe 10 k a week, so not much. Eventually I would love to start running or doing high aerobics also, but I do not want to force myself to do it. I would like to feel like doing it one day.
But I am thinking that maybe even 3000 cals isn't even enough. I weigh around 75 kg, so 75*10=750 gr of carb * 4 = 3000 cals in carb without exersize, so if I move, even more.
So maybe I would be safest going for 4000 a day? I almost only eat bananas and dates, a bit of frozen blueberries ang spinach, sometimes mangoes. Everything organic except mangoes and blueberry.
I am just done with this, I can feel how I harm my body with the cooked foods. I want to break free of this selfdestructive habbit and I want to be free and finally be me, which 811 allows me to.
I deep down off course know what would be best, I have a long time known that I felt my best on 4000 cals, but somehow I never seemed to reach it. It is like I have some mental barrier to reach those calories, I never seem to do it. And on days where I supposedly should have eaten 3500 I always leave something of my fruitmeals and throw it out. It is like I am cheating myself to believe I ate it, but I really didn't. And I really need people to tell me, I just need some support.
I am not desperate and I truly love this lifestyle and this forum. Once again I just need some of the loving support from people in here. I am sorry that you mostly see post like this from me, since this is not really me. I look forward to the day where the true Cecilie finally can break free. One day I will hopefully look back at this and think "wow so much I learned, it is so nice to be on the other site". The true Cecilie is so peacefull, loving and in connection with life, nature and beauty in a unexplainable way and I really want her to stay with me :)
I know I probably have been repeating myself in some old post and I am so sorry, but I am person that needs to be told 1000 times. So thank you for reading my post and once again having patience with me.
Bless you Cecilie!!!
You are doing Really WELL!!!
Stick with it and you will reach your goals!!! with love and peace, PLA
thank you so much! <3 that warms my heart
Four thousand calories seems totally reasonable to me. As far as activity goes, I pretty much just walk my dogs for an hour or two almost every day. I'm 5'1" and I need at least 3000 calories/day. Before my period, I need 4000-4500. Go for it. I bet you'll feel awesome.
Since you don't have a huge amount of variety in your fruit, eating enough greens becomes even more important. So make sure you're getting at least a pound in and try to get some variety with that too - change up your spinach once in a while!